Sunday, November 20, 2016

STILL HASN'T TURNED UP, SO...

Well it's been a couple weeks since the ukulele just vanished in thin air. I stopped worrying about it. Stay gone for all I care. Makes me no difference. The air is lighter in my house since it has been MIA.  So I have been taking the opportunity to enjoy my new ukulele. The one I bought from Amazon. Ya know.. The one that isn't haunted.

I have been logging onto my favorite online ukulele lessons site. It's called Center Stage Ukulele Academy.
I am really enjoying it and learning a lot. It's amazing when there is nothing in life to bother you or distract you, how much you can get done.  I would advise any of you out there reading this, if you want a good site to learn the ukulele at an affordable price, these guys are the way to go.  They teach you everything from how to buy a ukulele to learning techniques like ukulele barre chords.

So I am taking this time to get as deep into this as possible because I have absolutely no idea when stuff is going to start ramping up again. It sucks because it is always in the back of my mind. Like there is something looking and ready to throw everything into a tailspin again.

Right now I am going through their list of ukulele songs, trying to pick out a couple to really learn and master.  I will keep you posted.

Monday, November 14, 2016

NO SUN

Ok, now I hve totally had it.. The ukulele is gone. Yes.. GONE! Remember last post I had this guy read my blog and said he thought it was cool to have a haunted uke? I seems he likes to collect haunted objects. Well I told him that I would sell it to him gladly.. And of course.. I can't find it. It vanished.

How I noticed this was, I was on my new uke. The one I bought on Amazon. I was learning the Here Comes The Sub chords when I thought, this would sound really good on the old ukulele. I searched everywhere and I can't find it. It is as if it knows that I finally found a new home for it.

So the dude keeps on calling me and leaving messages but I don't know what to say to him. I've looked for three days no and nothing. Nowhere to be found. Maybe if I talk to it.. Maybe if I tell it that it can stay.. But thing is I don;t want it to stay. I want it the hell out of my house and my life..

Any suggestions on what I should do?

Thursday, November 3, 2016

WELL, IT'S STARTED AGAIN!

I give up, man. I am at the end o my rope.

So someone saw this blog and reached out to me and asked me if I would be willing to sell the haunted ukulele. I said HELL YES.  I asked him if he knew that it was a little... "off" ya know? He said he was aware of it and that he is into collecting haunted items. I told him that I would gladly GIVE him the ukulele at no charge. I told him to email me his address and I would put it int he mail this weekend.,

So last night I had this really really horrible dream. I was boxing up the ukulele and getting ready to walk ouyt the door to go to the post office. The front door was gone. I looked all over the house for a way to get out and there was none. No doors. No windows. No way out. All of a sudden I hear something I heard when I first got it. It sounded like the Somewhere Over The Rainbow ukulele chords, but out of tune and eerie.

The feeling of dread started engulfing my body and I started to panic. I dropped the ukulele and ran all over the house, desperate to find a way out. The eerie playing getting louder and louder. And then I hear laughing.

I wake up screaming.

I knew right there and then that it won't let me go. It was determined to stay in my life. The weekend passed and I never made it to the post office. The man contacted me again but I haven't responded yet. Maybe it is for the best. I don't want to put someone else in this position. Yes I know he collects haunted items but I don't think he knows what he will be getting into with this ukulele.

I'm stuck.


online ukulele lessons

teach yourself ukulele

Tuesday, November 1, 2016

IT'S BEEN QUIET THE LAST FEW DAYS

I'm wondering if the ukulele knows. It's been really quiet the last few days. The calm before the storm? Maybe. Maybe it knows that I will ship it off if it acts up again. Maybe it is trying really hard to behave itself.

All I know is that there hasn't been any strange occurrences since the mailman dropped it off. Maybe it just wanted out of the box. For the last few days I just dropped it in the corner of the room and left it there. But it has been really quiet.  So this morning I woke up with this urge to play it. I don't know why I had that urge. I just did. So after breakfast I went over to the box and took it out. I have been practicing ukulele barre chords on my new uke. It sounded pretty good but I have to admit, the old uke sounded way better. It just has this certain tone. This character that I cannot explain. 

I then began to practice my Here Comes The Sun Ukulele lesson that I found online. Still no shenanigans. I am wondering if I am out of the woods now. Maybe the ukulele just wants a home. Just wants to be loved. Maybe all those weird things were it calling out for attention. Maybe.

So far so good.


Saturday, October 29, 2016

CAT AND STRING TAILS

So in my last post, i was complaining about me getting my haunted ukulele returned to me on ebay. No matter what I try to do, I cannot get this damn thing out of my life. What started out as an innocent attempt to play some ukulele songs has turned into a damn nightmare.

So I get this thing back in the mail and i remember looking out the window and the mailman coming up the block. He was actually whistling. He was happy and my heart filled with dread. It actually looked like he was walking up the block in slow motion. It was sickening.

Let me go back for a second. When I sent this ukulele to the lucky ebay winner, I immediately went online  to take a tutorial on how to buy a ukulele. You know, what to look for, which ones are good. And I actually found one and ordered it. It came a coupl of days later via Amazon Prime.

I was a little scared because of the crazy experience I had with my previous ukulele but I didn't let that stop me. I went online and found a lesson with the Riptide ukulele chords. I was actually getting pretty good at it.. When I have it down, I will post a video of me playing it.

So now, I have the old ukulele back and I haven't even opened the box. I am trying really hard to ignore it. But my mind keeps wandering to it. I don't know what to expect. I have this sick feeling in my stomach. I will let you know if anything happens with it..

Monday, October 24, 2016

WILL I EVER GET RID OF THIS THING?

Just when I got rid of my ukulele, it comes back. The ebay user had it for one day.. ONE DAY! He said he had a "bad feeling" from it. I guess it is my fault because I but a 14 day return policy on it. I was hoping that I could get to the 15th day and put this behind me. Didn't happen. 
I even added that I would pay for three months of online ukulele lessons. Didn't work. I mean don't you think that an offer of 3 months of free ukulele lessons would be a good incentive? I did. It wasn't. 

So now what the hell do I do. Should I burn it? Should I give it away for free? I think that is my only option at this point. I am obviously not going to be able to sell it. I did have a thought that I advertise it for what it is and be totally open about the ukulele. Tell them that I believe that is it haunted. I mean there are people who get off on stuff like this. It's sort of foreign  to me but hey whatever floats your boat. My only concern is to get rid of this thing. 

I will keep you posted. 

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

GOODBYE HAUNTED UKULELE

So I finally found someone to buy the dang ukulele that has been causing us so many problems. I sold it on ebay for a measly 20 bucks. Fine I don't care. I will take the hit just to get that damn thing out of here.

I never ever thought someone would go through something like this trying to teach yourself ukulele. It's probably just me because I have that kind of luck. So now all I have to do is wrap this thing up and bring it to the post office and it will be out of my life for good. \

This doesn't mean I am going to give up my dream of learning how to play. I just need to be more careful and figure out how to buy a ukulele online so I don't go through this mess again. I guess I can always go into my local music store and get one too.. Problem is I am an amazon kind of guy. Way more convenient.

Until I replace this thing, I guess learning the Riptide ukulele chords will have to wait. I will keep you posted..

Tuesday, October 11, 2016

MY HAUNTED UKULELE PT.3

I really think it is time to get rid of this ukulele. Way too many unexplainable things are happening in my house. I have to think of my wife and kids. It's crazy. What started out as an innocent desire to learn ukulele songs to sing around the house has turned into a frickin' nightmare.

It's not just happening at night now. It's happening during the day. It happens when I sleep. The dreams. Or should I say the nightmares. It's unbearable. It sucks. If I had the money I would have bought myself a brand new ukulele. I wouldn't have to scour the internet and go the "teach yourself ukulele"route. This was the only option I had.

So now I am at a crossroad. I can't really afford to buy myself a new ukulele. I can't really afford to take private lessons. I don't want to put my wife and kids through this horrible ordeal with these strange things happening in my house.

I am kind of screwed. Any thoughts?

Monday, October 10, 2016

MY HAUNTED UKULELE PT.2

MY UKULELE GENTLY WEEPS

     You ever had one of those dreams where you wake up in your bed but you are still really sleeping. I dreamed that I woke up to music. It sounded like a ukulele playing. I couldn't figure out what it was as far as the tune. It sounded like an old record playing but like the record was warped. There was a glow throughtout my house and I walked toward the sound. It is hard ot explain. I mean, I was walking in a dark house but there was this eerie glow as if my path was illuminated by a flickering candle. 

   As I made my way toward the sound I started to make out what was playing. And as I write this, the hair on my neck is standing straight up. It sounded like it was playing the Somewhere Over the Rainbow chords.. It sounded Hawaiian but also like it was playing on a broken kids record player.. 

As I go down the hall the music is getting louder and louder. I finally realize that it is coming from my son's room. I slowly push open the door and look at my son fast asleep in his bed. I glance over to the corner and a little girl was rocking his his little rocking chair slowly strumming the chords. Her legs swinging back and forth. She looks up at me and smiles. 

I immediately wake up with a jolt. I catch my breath and lightly in the background I can still here the chords playing. 

Creepy as hell

Thursday, October 6, 2016

MY HAUNTED UKULELE

I think my ukulele is haunted. I'm deadly serious. Ever since this thing arrived, there has been some crazy stuff going on in my house.

HOW IT ALL STARTED

I went to Hawaii with my wife. We go there pretty much every coupl eof years. We got married there and we just think of it as, ya know.. our place.  Anyway, we went to this luau and there was this pretty Hawaiian lady sitting around a fire and she was playing this beautiful song and gently strumming her ukulele. I wish I knew what the song was but it was in her native tongue so I honestly have no clue.

When we got home, i really felt this stron urge to get online and find a ukulele. I wanted a good one but I didn't want to break the bank. So of course where do I go? Ebay.. Because you know what they say.. "One man's trash is another man's treasure" After searching and searching and hours of researching I came across someone selling this ukulele.. He said it was passed down to him from his mom and her mom before that. He claimed that the instrument has been in his family for generations. Hmmm.. I wonder why he wants to get rid of it.  Well he was only asking $35.00 for the damn thing and well that was in my price range.. I guess knowing that it was a family heirloom made it even more attractive.

WHILE I WAITED FOR MY UKE

I was excited for my ukulele to arrive and instead of sitting everyday by my front door waiting for Dean.(that's our mailman) i figered I would look for a site where you could teach yourself ukulele.  
I end up googling around and I find a site and join. I didn't know where to start.. Well I wanted to start playing ukulele songs right away but thats always been my problem. I like to put the cart before the horse.  Anyway, this site had all the basic lessons I needed to get up and running.. I would get to the songs later. 


DEAN ARRIVED WITH MY UKE

I've never been more happy to see Dean roll up in his little mail buggy and get out with his mailman shorts and ring my bell. I excitedly opened the door and could hardly contain myself. I almost snatched the box out of his hand but dean pulled it away. "Ah ah ah.. You need to sing for it first." Did I mention how much of a tool Dean is. Well no Christmas envelope for you diptard.

I signed, snatched my package out of his slimy hands, yelled, "Thanks Dean!" and slammed the door in his face. I ran to the kitchen counter and ripped open the box. There it was.. This old, not so attractive, faded piece of wood with strings. It was the most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes on. Spent six hours that night going through the lessons. I sucked pretty heavily but i din't care. It was bliss.

WHAT'S THAT STRANGE SMELL?

That night as I lay in bed watching a flick on Netflix, this strange smell immediately devoured the room. I will try to explain it. It was like a mixture of Plumeria and cigar smoke.. It was a strange smell.. I;ve always loved the smell of Plumeria as it reminds me of my time in Hawaii but thee cigar smoke was a mystery. No one in my house smokes and I do have a few friends that enjoy the occasional cigar but they know the rules of my house. No Smoking ever! I got up and made my way through the house to see where it might be coming from. I opened the door to the outside and all i could smell was freshly cut grass. It was so weird.

3 AM

I was jolted awake at exactly 3am by a loud crash in my living room. It freaked me out. Was someone in my house? My wife asked me if I heard it. I told her yes and to stay put. I reached into my night table and took out my mace. (Yes mace.. We don't believe in guns in this household)

I slowly made my way through the dark hallways. searching through every room. Nothing. I made my way into the living room and flicked on the light. My ukulele was out of the case and sitting out on the floor. I could have sworn I put it away after I was done playing it. Hmmm..  I picked it up from the floor and put it back into the case and put it in the corner. As I turned to go back to bed, I smelled Plumeria. I mean like I was in the middle of a field of Plumeria plants. It was that strong.

STAY TUNED FOR PART TWO ABOUT MY HAUNTED UKULELE..


Wednesday, December 12, 2012

You might be asking yourself why Center Stage Guitar Academy is so affordable compared to other online guitar lesson sites. Some of the most popular online guitar lessons sites are priced at around $20.00 a month.  Center Stage Guitar Academy only costs you $9.99 a month and we are getting ready to offer a Christmas special of only $4.99 a month for life if you sign up by December 31st! Does this mean Center Stage Guitar Academy is not as good?  How can we do it so cheap?  Well here is the answer.  Firstly, we are a new company and don't have the quantity of lessons that other sites have, so we don't feel like we can charge you the same price.  However we add new lessons on a monthly basis, so we are constantly building our repertoire of lessons. The quality of our lessons are on par with other lesson sites.  We have high quality, split screen videos that give you full access to the instructor with several angles.  Second, we can offer you quality lessons at a lower price because we are a small, personalized business with very little overhead.  The company is made up of only three people...an instructor, video producer, and web designer.  We keep it small in an effort to bring you high quality lessons at a very affordable price so everybody has the opportunity to learn guitar.  Please visit us at www.csgacademy.com and start learning how to play guitar.
You might be asking yourself why Center Stage Guitar Academy is so affordable compared to other online guitar lesson sites. Some of the most popular online guitar lessons sites are priced at around $20.00 a month.  Center Stage Guitar Academy only costs you $9.99 a month and we are getting ready to offer a Christmas special of only $4.99 a month for life if you sign up by December 31st! Does this mean Center Stage Guitar Academy is not as good?  How can we do it so cheap?  Well here is the answer.  Firstly, we are a new company and don't have the quantity of lessons that other sites have, so we don't feel like we can charge you the same price.  However we add new lessons on a monthly basis, so we are constantly building our repertoire of lessons. The quality of our lessons are on par with other lesson sites.  We have high quality, split screen videos that give you full access to the instructor with several angles.  Second, we can offer you quality lessons at a lower price because we are a small, personalized business with very little overhead.  The company is made up of only three people...an instructor, video producer, and web designer.  We keep it small in an effort to bring you high quality lessons at a very affordable price so everybody has the opportunity to learn guitar.  Please visit us at www.csgacademy.com and start learning how to play guitar.

Monday, December 10, 2012

Is there a big difference between private, in-person, guitar lessons and online guitar lessons?  Well I think that depends on the individual and how far along you are in the process of learning guitar. First, if you are a beginner and not a very disciplined person then online lessons would not be the best choice.  However if you are disciplined and can hold your own feet to the fire then I think you could benefit from online guitar lessons.    Online guitar lessons offer a lot of benefits over private lessons.  One, way way cheaper.  Learn guitar at Center Stage Guitar Academy and pay $120 a year.  Learn from a private instructor and pay $1200 a year! Big difference.  Two, you can learn how to play guitar at your own pace with online lessons.  You can go as fast or slow as you want.  Three, you can do it from home at your own convenience.  If you are already playing and just want to expand, then online lessons are great because you already know the basics.  If you need someone to hold you accountable for learning then private lessons are the answer.  However, if you are not motivated enough to keep yourself accountable then you are probably not going to see it through anyway. And in the process waste a lot more money on private lessons.


Center Stage Guitar Academy has just finished filming the next two volumes forwww.csgacademy.com.  These two volumes include 20 online guitar lessons that cover such topics as Suspended Chords, slash chords, connecting chords with scales, Triads, Inversions, and much more. These lessons should be edited and published within the next two weeks.  Learn guitar now at Center Stage Guitar Academy!
Online guitar lessons seem to be the popular thing now.  There are hundreds of products out there that offer free and easy guitar lessons.  Some of them make claims such as "Learn guitar in 3 weeks" or "Play like a pro in 2 days!"  While I think there are several high quality sites out there, no site or teacher can promise these claims with any certainty.  The only way to become a good guitar player is to practice, practice, practice!  So remember when you sign up to learn guitar online , it is still up to you to put the time and effort into learning.